Wellness with Vanda
A women's health podcast where we'll be talking about hormones, mindset, motherhood, & everything in between. The host, Vanda, is a functional medicine nurse coach that helps women overcome hormone imbalance so that they can achieve optimal wellness. In her private practice she specializes in HTMA testing and DUTCH testing. Throughout this podcast she shares tips for boosting energy naturally, improve mood, recover from mom burnout, ways to increase fertility, ways to improve sleep quality, tips for pregnancy, tips for navigating postpartum and the fourth trimester, and more!
Wellness with Vanda
39: Cade's Birth Story and Postpartum Recovery Update
Welcoming you back after a short break, I dive headfirst into my birth story with Cade and share how I'm recovering postpartum.
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Hey, welcome back to the podcast. I have just sat down after feeding Cade. Normally he would take a nap right after feeding, but he's currently staring at me from his little seat that he's laying in next to me, so you may hear little baby noises or little baby toots in the background while I record this and I honestly may not even be able to get through the whole episode. Who knows, that's just life with a newborn. I was invited to be on someone else's podcast earlier this week and I had to turn them down for now because I was like there's no way I can do a podcast recording right now and guarantee that like there's not going to be an interruption or I wouldn't have to like get up in the middle of the interview and tend to my baby. So anyway, that's just part of it for right now. It's been almost two months, right? Yeah, it was like mid-July when I recorded the last like regular episode of the podcast. I've been doing some of the Friday questions and I absolutely love that, but I just have not had the I don't know brain space to sit down and do regular episodes and I'm not sure that I will bring them back just yet. I'll just see how things go over the next few weeks. But I did want to sit down. Cade is like right at right past, being a month old, and I promised that I would share like his birth story and a postpartum update after he was born, and I've just yet to do that. So I don't feel like this episode is going to be very exciting. Given the fact that I gave birth to him without a doctor in the room, it should be like an exciting story, but it's really not. But I'm going to share it. But I do first want to give some background, to kind of answer some of the questions that I've been getting around, like his delivery and my labor and how prepped for labor and stuff like that. So I have two other children that I have given birth to. We yes, we have four kids now total, but we adopted my oldest son. So when Kenley was born, my water broke with her in the middle of the night. It woke me up. I thought I peed on myself. I contemplated that for a while before I woke anybody up. Then I decided no, this is like my water has broken. We need to go on to the hospital. We got to the hospital.
Speaker 1:I have gone into my labors with a very open mind every time. I don't do a lot of planning. I, to be honest with you, don't really believe in like having a birth plan, because I really think like whatever is going to happen is going to happen, and I'm not saying that there aren't things you should do to prepare yourself, but I think by going into it with this very structured plan of I'm going to do this and it's going to be exactly like this and all of this is going to happen, this, this and really special, and you can be left feeling disappointed when you didn't have to have that type of pressure on yourself. So I went into my very first labor not knowing if I would get an epidural or not, just being open minded. You know, when you are giving birth for the first time, you have no idea what that's going to feel like and nobody can really explain it to you. Like they can tell you how it felt for them, they can tell you how intense it felt for them, but until you are experiencing it you just don't know. And I think that's one of the things that causes a lot of fear around giving birth is just the unknown. So I got to a point in my labor that I was like I can handle this pain level but if it gets worse I feel like I'm going to want something and I was terrified to get an epidural. That was like one of that it's still like super duper freaks me out. I cried through the whole experience. You know they don't let anybody be in the room with you while you get your epidural family wise, so like my husband and my mom, who were with me during labor, had to leave. I didn't like that. Thankfully I knew the nurse that was with me and she was very comforting and she like recognized that I was terrified and she comforted me. But anyway I did get the epidural with Kinley. All in all I was in labor with her for around like 12 hours.
Speaker 1:So then next comes Hollis, who, kinley, also, came early. My water broke when I was 37 weeks and six days. So then when I got pregnant with Hollis, I just assumed wrongfully so that I would probably go early again. So for like weeks leading up to my birth and his due date I was like any day now I'm going to have this baby and I'm going to go into labor. And he actually didn't come until his due date.
Speaker 1:But since with Kenley, when my water broke in the middle of the night, I really wasn't having contractions yet. That didn't really start to like kick in and start happening until right about the time we arrived at the hospital and after I had been there for a little bit, I just I kept telling myself like I don't really know how I'm going to know when it's time to go to the hospital and people would kind of blow me off and be like I don't really know how I'm going to know when it's time to go to the hospital and people would kind of blow me off and be like oh, you'll know when it's time. Well, apparently not, because I unintentionally waited too long and his labor went super quickly. Like, looking back on it now, I recognize that I was in labor at like two, three o'clock in the afternoon and it just was very manageable. But we didn't get to the hospital until like six something and he was born within 40 ish minutes of us being there.
Speaker 1:And I knew, I knew when we were on the way to the hospital like I literally had a fear like I'm going to have this baby in this car on the way to the hospital. We live like 30 to 40 minutes away from the hospital and we got there and the nurse was asking me questions my water had not broke yet and she was like, do you want to get an epidural? And I was like I mean, I had kind of planned on it but I don't think we're going to have time. And I was right. I was standing on the side of the bed and my water broke and pretty quickly I was like after my water broke they wanted me to get in the bed and stay in the bed. And so I did and pretty quickly I was like I feel like I need to push. And she checked me and, sure enough, like it was time they got the doctor in there, got everything set up. I pushed a few times.
Speaker 1:The doctor that I had that delivered, paulus, was excellent because, like I said, I did not go into that planning to give birth naturally, since I had gotten the epidural with Kenley. I just thought I'll need it with this delivery too, and I had done nothing to prepare, to educate myself, nothing, and that was like a big mistake. That is advice that I give to every mom, no matter what pregnancy they're on, no matter what their plan is for delivery. I always tell them now, like, do some things to prepare and educate yourself about natural labor, because you may not have a choice. But the doctor that I had was great about coaching me through it and you know I didn't have to push for very long. He was here.
Speaker 1:So my fear, going into this pregnancy and labor, was like will I make it to the hospital? Pregnancy and labor was like will I make it to the hospital? Am I going to know, uh, when to go to the hospital so that we go, you know, a little earlier on this time? And, um, you know, like again, how am I going to know when it's time to go? And so I just told myself that, like you know, with Hollis, I had this fear of being one of these ladies that shows up to the hospital and then being like, honey, you're not in labor, and sending me home and me feeling silly that you know, I thought I was in labor when I wasn't and I was like this time I don't care, I'd rather be at the hospital in plenty of time than give birth to my baby on the side of the road. So I've kind of lost my train of thought. I had to give Cade the pacifier and now I've lost my train of thought, anyway.
Speaker 1:So with Cade I also went into the labor. People kept asking me like now you've done it both ways, are you going to get an epidural, are you not? And I still just had that same mindset Like if I need it and I want it, I'll get it. If I feel like I can get through it without it. Now that I know exactly like what it feels like and what to expect, then I won't get it Because again, I'm terrified of that needle going in my back for the epidural. So we got to the hospital around. Well, let me back up.
Speaker 1:I got up the morning that Cade was born and I told my husband I had a doctor's appointment that day and originally I was going to drive myself to that appointment. I told my husband I was like I really feel like you should drive me and we should take all of our bags and like, get this kids squared away, because I feel like I'm having pretty consistent contractions this morning. I think I'll, you know, go on into labor today, especially after this appointment. So, going for my appointment, she checks me, she does a sweep. I was four centimeters dilated.
Speaker 1:Um, and we go to leave from the appointment and my husband was kind of like, okay, like you want to go get lunch? And I didn't. I felt kind of nauseous that morning, like I did not want to eat at all. Um, I was like, no, I feel like that might make me sick. Um, let's just, you know, I don't know, do you? If you want to go eat, like, I'll happily like get a drink and sit with you or whatever.
Speaker 1:But I could already feel that like my contractions were getting a little closer together and he was going to go home and we got to the point where we would like get on the parkway to go home. And again, we live like 30 minutes away and I had that fear of not making it to the hospital in time. And I was like he works in the town where the hospital is. I was like, can we just go to your office and like hang out for a while and see what happens and how I'm feeling here in like an hour or so? So we go over to his office and we both are working and we're there for probably like an hour, maybe two hours, and I was like, okay, I think it's like time I'm timing. I've been timing my contractions on an app, like the whole time, and we get to the hospital hospital, it's around, it's around one o'clock, um and you know, they get me checked in.
Speaker 1:Whatever I'm telling them, they're asking me, like, do you want to get an epidural, do you not? And I decided at that point that, like I was going to try to go without it, um, if I could, because I just I just didn't want that needle going in my back. It's not because I mean and there's there's other reasons too Like I do think it was better for me, better for my recovery. You know, not exposing the baby to medications that they didn't need to be exposed to is great. Wow, thanks, okay, um, so I did a lot of moving around.
Speaker 1:I wasn't in the bed, hardly at all, because I mean it wasn't comfortable for me to try to like sit and lay anyway. But also I knew that I wanted to keep my labor going and keep the contractions going, because I didn't want to labor forever. So I knew that, like, being up and being active and walking and being like on a birthing ball and doing different things would help keep the labor process progressing. So around six o'clock they came in and checked me and I think I thought it's hard to remember. I wish I had written all this down because it's like you think you'll remember these tiny details and then you just, you just can't.
Speaker 1:But I think at that point I was six centimeters and I knew that my water broke with Hollis when I was like seven centimeters and I knew that things went so quick after that and I kept telling my mom and Blake were in the room with me again and I was that things went so quick after that and I kept telling my mom and Blake were in the room with me again and I was like I just wish my water would break, because then I feel like things would, we could get on with this. And so I also joked I'm a nurse for you guys that may not know that shift change in the world of nursing happens at 7 am and 7 pm and I knew she checked me at six and I was like it's going to be my luck that it'll be right at seven o'clock and I'll be ready to push and they're going to be in the middle of shift change and I, you know, I just hate that that was going to happen that way and I was just kind of joking with my mom and Blake about it. Well, sure enough, I feel like that's like a nurse curse thing that that would happen to me. But anyway, it was around 6.58 or so I was on the side of the bed again almost, and it's so funny because I was in the exact same labor room as when I had Hollis and I was standing in almost the exact same spot when my water broke. My water broke and immediately I was like like new to hit the button without me even saying anything and tell them that when my water had broke, and they were just kind of like okay, you know, and they click off the thing. Well, I was just like immediately in extreme pain, like I had the thought in my mind like holy shit, why didn't I get the epidural? Like this is, this is terrible pain. Um, you know what kind of wish I hadn't I hadn't made that decision. But no, going back now and I'm like waiting for the nurse to come in, and all of this happens in a matter of like two minutes.
Speaker 1:But you know, you have like all these thoughts so quick in your mind that it takes me longer to tell it back than everything actually happened. But you know, I'm standing there and like like my mom can tell that I'm just like in so much pain and I kind of can't even like move, like I'm still standing on the side of the bed and I knew enough that like I needed to get in position. Like I had this thought in my mind, like I feel like I need to get in the bed because, like what if I, what if this baby, what if I have the baby? And like it falls on the floor or something, and like Blake's looking at me and he's like what do you need? And I was like I don't know.
Speaker 1:And then like another second passes and I'm like you need to hit the button again and tell them that whoever is going to be in this room for delivery needs to get in here. So he hits the button again and I'm telling him and my mom like simultaneously, like I said, all these things are happening. I tell them I'm like help me, get in the bed. I don't know if I can get myself in the bed, but I feel like I need to get in the bed.
Speaker 1:So the nurse comes in the room as they're like getting me in the bed and I'm like awkwardly kind of sideways in the bed. I'm not even fully, fully in the bed and she's like over to the side messing with trying to put on sterile gloves and stuff so she can check me and whatever. And she's like talking and just kind of like casual not casually, but it felt to me like casually and I was like I knew her name. I said her name. I'm like this baby is coming, now I need to push, and she comes over and she's like no, try not to push. I'm like I can't, I have to push. And I pushed and Cade came out Like it.
Speaker 1:I hate. I hate when they tell you like well, try not to put, don't push, yet Don't put, when you're at that point in your labor that that happens. Your body is doing it Like there is no. I physically could have not like stopped that from happening if I wanted to. I just couldn't have. And I'm like immediately. So and immediately again, the nurse in me knows that like this is not supposed to happen this way. There's no doctor in the room. There was one nurse in the room. Thank goodness she had gotten over and I had gotten myself like enough in the bed that like she halfway caught Cade when he came out. You know, um felt bad Cause. I'm like I know this is going to be like an incident report. She's going to have to fill all this paperwork because the doctor's not in here. Um, and you know, it was fine. It was fine.
Speaker 1:A couple of minutes later the doctor came in and he he's getting ready to. Uh, he was not the doctor that I saw through my entire pregnancy. He just happened to be there to cover that day. But I knew that he was getting ready to take some time off. He joked with me. He was like well, you're just proving that. You know I'm not really needed around here, but anyway, that's Cade's birth story. Kind of crazy, I guess, the way that things like ended up. But again, it really wasn't that like. It's not really that crazy of a story. It just my water broke. I needed to push, I pushed and he came out.
Speaker 1:I remember my doctor telling me that morning when she checked me and I was forced anywhere, she was like he's well, she didn't say he cause, we didn't know if it was a boy or a girl. She was like the baby is really low and I guess you know. I guess when my water broke, you know that cushion is no longer there and the baby was just ready to come out, and so, of course, too, my mom was the one that actually like got to tell me if the baby was a boy or a girl. Because I mean, like I said, there was just one nurse in there and Blake was on my right side. Mom was on my left side and I don't think Blake could really see anything because the nurse was also standing on my right side, so I don't even think he could see yet if the baby was a boy or a girl. But I remember my mom saying oh, it's a boy.
Speaker 1:And I was so surprised I can't remember if I shared with you guys or not, but I was so confident, so confident that the baby was a girl, that we didn't even fully have a boy name picked out. Um, and other people had joked with me like, well, it's going to end up being a boy because you don't have a boy name picked out and you're not preparing, you know, for a boy. Like I was so confident that the baby was a girl that I had gotten out, um, all of my like newborn and itty bitty girl clothes, put them away, got them ready, like so, so surprised. So it took us like an hour to decide on Cade's name. We ended up selecting Cade Bennett. I had found the name Cade a couple weeks back and we both liked it. We just, like I, couldn't decide if I liked it for a first name or a middle name, and if we used it as a middle name, we couldn't really find something that we liked to go with it as the first name, so we ended up using Cade Bennett. Bennett is a family name from a few generations back, so that was really special.
Speaker 1:Postpartum I know that this episode has to be getting like so long, so I'm trying to get it wrapped up. Postpartum wise has been really good. I have felt really well. I had some trouble initially. I have a hemorrhoid that bothers me with each of my pregnancies and each time it like gets worse and it was the worst part of this whole experience. Um, so for several days it took like a week, maybe more, maybe 10 days for that to like. You know, the swelling to go down and it to go back in and it not be a problem Other than that.
Speaker 1:Things that nobody warns you about when you have multiple kids, I guess, is that with each of my recoveries, with each of my like babies and deliveries. Those contractions that you have after delivery, like for days after, like while you're breastfeeding, and stuff, get so much more intense. Like I can remember, one day it was probably the first or second day that we were home I was sitting on the couch and I was breastfeeding Cade and I mean I was having to like close my eyes and take deep breaths Like I would. I was in labor and Blake looked over at me and he was like, are you okay? You don't, you don't look good. And I was like I'm just having like these contractions that you have, and like the purpose of them is to help shrink your uterus back down to size and so that you don't start bleeding, and like they definitely serve a purpose.
Speaker 1:But I was so unaware that, like, with each time, that gets more intense and hurts worse with each of your pregnancies, because I remember after having Kenley I didn't have that at all and I do remember having it with Hollis and now, you know, with Kate. Um, I was talking to my friend about it and she said the same thing she's, she's had more kids than I have and she's, yeah, it gets more intense and more painful every time. So that was pretty rough. Otherwise, I mean, things have been going well. But I think that one of the reasons that it has gone well and I have felt like as good as I have is number one like I did what I could to take care of myself throughout the pregnancy and make sure that, like, my minerals stayed replenished and I was pretty active.
Speaker 1:I didn't work out, I didn't like lift weights or anything throughout my pregnancy, but I walked a lot and I did like some squats and different things, and I think the more that you can stay active and move during your pregnancy, I think that really helps both your labor and your recovery. And then I also just knew what to expect with you know, I've done this two other times now and I knew what to expect in terms of, like, how I was going to feel and what expectations to have around Cade and his sleep and breastfeeding. I just you know, when you've been through it before and you know how you coped with it, then you can better cope with it the next time. You know and that, and there hasn't been anything with Cade that was like you know, like health wise, like he's been fine, like he hasn't had significant troubles, like he has, his belly has been okay. Um, he's sleeping as he should be for a newborn, and then on through this first like month of his life.
Speaker 1:Um, you know, I was aware that like it's not normal and I shouldn't have the expectation that he's going to sleep through the night, especially breastfeeding. I knew that I was going to be getting up probably every two hours at first and then slowly that would go to three hours. And you know there's still. You know he's five weeks old and we're still like I'm lucky if I get a four hour stretch and that has just recently started this week. Most of the time we're still getting up at three hours, two hours. Um, and that's fine because that's what he's supposed to be doing. Am I tired? Yeah, but I have. Also, like I will sleep in some mornings if we have had a rough night and Blake takes care of getting the kids ready and getting them out the door. He normally does drop off anyway, so that's not that big of a deal, and then Kada also take naps together in the afternoons. If we've had a rough night and I'm feeling tired, even if we haven't had a rough night, if I'm just like tired and I feel like I need it, then I absolutely will give myself more than permission to take a nap if I need it.
Speaker 1:I think one of the things that's been hard for me this time postpartum has actually been slowing down enough. The first Monday we came home on a Saturday and of course the kids came home and met Cade for the first time on Saturday. Sunday we were all home together, but Monday everybody like Blake went back to work, the kids went back to school in the sitter, and that was kind of the way that I wanted it. I thrive in like a normal routine, so. But I felt so good that day that I did all kinds of stuff, like things that I had not felt like doing towards the end of my pregnancy, because you know, you're just like big and uncomfortable and I was having some trouble with sciatica and things um so like not organized a closet, um, I can't even remember like what all I did, but I majorly overdid it and I forgot to take I was still alternating Tylenol and Motrin and I just forgot to take them.
Speaker 1:So before we went to bed that night I was in a lot of pain, mainly from that dang hemorrhoid, not really anything else. But I remember being in tears before we went to bed because I realized that I had not like. I got to the point that I was hurting and I realized I hadn't taken my medicine. And of course I took some. But then it takes a while for it to kick in and I was like whoa, I majorly overdid it today. That was stupid. I know better than to do that. And so for the next couple of days I really pushed myself and made myself sit on the couch and watch TV and rest and really not do much else. Now you know, I do have three other active kiddos that still needed to eat and be tended to when they were home in the afternoon. So we Cade and I took advantage of the daytime like being home alone as much as we could to get that rest in.
Speaker 1:And then one of the questions that I got and I answered this in Instagram stories, but I wanted to address it here was like what I was doing supplement wise postpartum. So initially I am finishing up my full well prenatal. I don't want that to go to waste and there's excellent nutrients in there for even the postpartum period. So I'm still taking that. I'm almost done with it now. I did one bottle of full wells iron pump because you know you lose blood during your delivery and I had had some blood work related to those migraines that I was having while I was pregnant and I was kind of like right on the borderline of being a little anemic anyway. So that just kind of give me another push to take a bottle of that post-pregnancy.
Speaker 1:I'm getting ready, coincidentally, to just have some like yearly lab work done and they're going to check, like my blood counts and things again my iron levels. So if I end up needing it I would would take another round of that, but hopefully, hopefully I won't. Um, I'm doing vitamin D because I choose to supplement myself with vitamin D instead of giving vitamin D drops to my babies. Um, that just comes from past experiences that I won't get into today because I know this episode is getting so long, but definitely something. If your baby struggle with vitamin D drops, if it upsets their tummies, definitely look into that option because I've found it to be really effective for me and then I think that's it, like that's all I was taking.
Speaker 1:Initially. I finished the iron bump. Since then I'm finishing up the prenatal now and then, once I'm done with that prenatal, I'm going to switch back over to a multi-organ complex. Um, and for a bit that's probably going to be all that I take. Um. I am going to do a new HTMA test. Honestly, I thought that I would have already cut the sample and sent it off by then, but I literally just keep forgetting about it. Um, I just haven't thought about it, and then I'm going to get that lab work done too. So I'll see what those two things say and I'll make adjustments to my supplements at that time.
Speaker 1:Um, if I need to, I may not even need to um, and then, of course, I don't even consider these supplements anymore. But it is, they are supplements. I'm still doing mineral drinks and I'm doing lots of mineral drinks because you know, when you're breastfeeding, there's just like nothing like breastfeeding thirst anyway, but you are much more thirsty than normal. You need a lot of like, you need good hydration to make breast milk. So I've been doing the electrolytes in various different brands and flavors to just mix it up a little bit. So yeah, I don't know, I feel like I'm at the point now that I have started walking again.
Speaker 1:That has felt really good to me. I'm so glad the weather is still really nice. I've not had that with either of my two other pregnancies because my babies were born in the winter. But I love that like the sun is still shining, caden and I can go outside, he can put, he can roll in the stroller, I can walk. I've done a few days of like rehab work that you can do early on postpartum, but I'm hitting that point. Of course I'll be he'll be six weeks old next week and I'll get that like official clearance but I'm at the point now that I feel like I'm ready to start kind of working out and I don't want to say that like losing the baby weight I'm doing air quotes right now is like a top priority of mine right now, because it's not.
Speaker 1:However, I do want to lose that weight and I do feel like I can tackle it in a way that is still really supportive to my body's needs right now, as I'm still recovering and my sleep is not optimal right now and I'm providing nutrition for my baby through my body. I feel like I can tackle that in a way that I can achieve both and I'm feeling kind of conflicted about how much of that I want to share, because I think postpartum weight loss can be very triggering for some people and it can also set people up for, like other postpartum moms, to feel really pressured or feel like their body, like something is wrong if they're not having the same progress as somebody they're watching on Instagram. So I don't know, and I don't even know if it's something that you guys are interested in hearing about or seeing or like knowing what I'm doing. So that's, I guess the question that I would leave you with this week is like, do you care about that journey, that like postpartum weight loss journey? If you don't tell me, if you do tell me and I will decide, like from that what feels aligned to share and what doesn't, and I'll just kind of go from there. So I'm going to wrap this up.
Speaker 1:I know this probably got really long. Thanks for hanging in there with me. I know that I had some moments where I lost my train of thought. Thanks for hanging in there with me. I know that I had some moments where I lost my train of thought. Kate cried for a minute. That is part of postpartum life. So thanks for bearing with me. And, like I said, I don't know if I will resume these regular Tuesday podcast episodes just yet, because my time capacity and brainpower. Just I'm not sure that I'm ready for it, but regular podcast episodes will be coming back eventually. I would like to get some guest speakers in, but again, I've got to find a way and a time that I can record those interviews and then you'll probably continue to see me do the Friday questions, because those are like super short. I really enjoy doing those. I love when you guys send in the questions, so keep those coming, if you have not already submitted one, and I will talk with you guys soon.
